By the time I realized the disparity between church and university, we were a couple of months into the COVID epidemic, and I was doing all remaining interviews by phone. I figured that Roberts would be pretty busy in that situation, and so began by calling one of the senior associate pastors. However, when he realized the thrust of my interview, he said that the only person who could answer my questions was Roberts, and told me that I should call the office chief to arrange that. I did that immediately, but it was several months, and several more calls, before I was able to connect with Randy. Since I had promised to submit this paper, along with the much broader one that covered the Adventist Church and its LGBTQ members (which was published in the magazine in December 2020, and also featured in four parts on the website some months later), I attempted successfully to interview another long-term Associate Pastor, who confirmed that the church’s position then was as I reported in this paper. I did have a good discussion with Randy Roberts eventually, when I decided to focus on a personal question, which was whether or not I should move my membership to the church since I now lived in Loma Linda. As a result of what I confirmed from him, I decided it was best at present to keep my membership in a truly welcoming congregation, even though I now find the freeway travel for me to get there too daunting at my age to actually attend there. It is ironic that I am heavily involved in an excellent Sabbath School class at the LLUC that has proclaimed itself to be welcoming and lives up to that, and I will probably return to services at the LLUC when I feel safe to do so (I am avoiding large gatherings because of COVID) , because I very much appreciate Randy Roberts preaching. But I do not feel yet that it is sufficiently safe for me to feel comfortable bringing my membership there. Perhaps I should explain that after a lifetime as an LGBTQ+ Adventist existing in unwelcoming churches, I dealt with my situation about three decades ago by moving my membership to a welcoming congregation across the country at the invitation of the pastor, even though I could attend there only occasionally, attended a totally welcoming Forum chapter where I was president for 41 years and which met weekly but where I could not have my official church membership because it was an independent congregation, helped form SDA Kinship and worked with it at the frustrating long-term task of trying to encourage Adventists and our churches (and ultimately the church administration) to become a truly non-judgmental, loving, and welcoming place for all. These strategies worked well for me. But most LGBTQ+ Adventists have had really difficult and disappointing experiences, because the vast majority of Adventist churches are still not welcoming. Let me give you a personal example: When, after retiring, I moved from NYC to a warmer climate, the church I began to attend discovered I was a professional musician (I had a second career as organist, choir director and singer in Anglican/Episcopal churches in both Australia and NY) they asked me to play the organ and lead song services. But after the pastor leaked the fact that I had told him I was gay, all those opportunities ceased abruptly, people became nervous in their in interactions with me, and for months I sat alone in services until the elderly wife of an elder, who also sat alone, decided to sit with me–something I appreciated greatly.But eventually the stress of attending that church was a major reason in my decision to sell my home there and move to Loma Linda, in the hope of finding a better church situation. I know many Kinship members who have decided to cease attending such churches after similar, and often much worse, experiences. Shouldn’t church be a place where all, no matter how marginalized by society, feel wanted and safe? Are churches that fail to do that really Christian churches?
